Thursday, October 22, 2009

The Lord of the Ringlets

I’ll admit – it isn’t easy being married to a curly-haired boy. In the words of one redheaded girl, “Everybody hates people with naturally curly hair”.

If I was the redheaded girl, I would have rephrased it. I would have said, “Everybody hates the girl who’s married to the boy with the naturally curly hair”.

I don’t know what it is, but curly hair causes insanity in women. The moment they see ringlets they lose their minds. I know this from experience.

I also know this from observation.

Every time I go out with my boy I have to flash my wedding band at women. I hope they’ll pick up on small social cues like the fact that my husband is making out with me.

Yesterday even those small social cues failed. It was my own fault. I let my guard down.

McDonald’s felt like a safe place. The woman was pushing a walker. I was pretty sure she was the type of lady I’d like to adopt as a great-grandmother.

Until she started hitting on my husband.

“You don’t like him any, do you?” she asked – as if she really wanted to know. (Who were the police going to believe in this cat fight? Something tells me they’d side with the woman with the walker.)

I had no choice but to let her continue. When she finally finished her string of come-ons, she patted me on the butt and walked away.

Yes, me. On the butt. Miss Personal-Space. Miss Don’t-Touch-Me-Unless-You’re-My-Husband. Or should I say Mrs. Married-To-The-Guy-You-Just-Hit-On?

Come to think of it, maybe I have something to be grateful for: She did not pat him on the butt.

Good thing for her, or I would have had use my superpowers to overcome the dark, dark evil.

Walker or no walker – you shouldn’t mess with the Lord of the Ringlets.


Elaina M. Avalos said...

LOL! The Lord of the Ringlets...too funny! I can't believe she patted you on the butt. What an odd little lady!

I listen to country music and one of my favorite singers is Dierks Bentley who has had curly hair. A few years ago, he shaved his head. Sent his female fans into a total tizzy. I don't remember where now but I came across ONE lowly photo of his new curl-less do and I posted it on my blog with a silly post about the whole thing.

Well my only (and I do mean only) claim to fame was that for several days I was number one on Google for "Dierks Bentley shaved head pics." LOL!!! I have never had so many hits to my blog. It was the funniest thing ever. I thought it was hilarious that everyone was so up and arms. So I think you're right...the curls do something to women.

banderclip said...

lol! how awkward...some old ladies are weird. My husband has some pretty cute curls, but he makes me cut his hair so I can't see them. *sigh*


Sarah Sundin said...

Too funny. My oldest son (17) has gorgeous loose brown curls. All his life people have touched his hair like they do a pregnant woman's belly. Now he vacillates between the buzz cut (which fits his personality) and wearing it long (which the girls love). Once he got it buzzed, and a good female friend slapped him! Now she bribes him with pop tarts to get him to keep it long.

Arianna said...

LOL, you're hilarious! My day always gets brighter when I visit your blog ;)

Yep, you're totally right. Girls love curly hair on guys. I'm always telling my brother he looks cute with his curly hair, but he just rolls his eyes and complains about how much work it is. LOL.

JillY said...

As a woman married to a VERY straight haired man, I will admit, I find the other side of the fence quite enticing....HOWEVER....I refrain from hitting on the men of curls and resort to trying to marry my daughters off to them instead!

Malia George said...

hahahah.. Omw.. this post made me laugh!! :D

I know all about waiting--for the right guy, for high school to end, for my boobs to come in (two out of three ain't bad).

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